Learning as a lifestyle, and the concept of 'Asset Poor, Money Rich'

I have been thinking a little more about what I should do with myself once I graduate. Two themes I want to address today are:

• Learning as a lifestyle
• Refusing to accept today’s lifestyle of “Asset Rich, Money Poor” – instead embracing “Asset Poor, Money/Lifestyle Rich”
  

Learning as a lifestyle

Perhaps another reason (I know, I keep on giving many differing but relevant reasons) why I have not enjoyed my degree is because I haven’t been increasing my skill set. Whose fault is this? Perhaps it is my own. But should I be blamed? All I can say is that I hope to pass on my lessons to someone else one day.

What skill sets do I think are valuable in the school of life? I think the key skill sets involve managing people – this is what leadership is about. And leading people (by articulating them around your vision) is about actions which follow a spectrum from carrot to stick – or from fighting to serving.

Fighting
Yes, that’s right – fighting as a skill. And I mean in all respects – physically, intellectually, emotionally and spiritually. Physically, well I haven’t got into a fight. Perhaps I have not allowed myself to. Intellectually, fighting at Oxford brings no reward, despite all the claims on the tin. The views of your tutor are likely to be so ingrained as to make fighting impossible, and if you do try to fight the likelihood is that your work will be branded a polemic. Emotional fighting – I think this is about fighting with yourself. But the only way you win this is if you truly believe the fight you are having is worth it. Are you tired for an end goal? Good. Were you beaten because you tried? Fantastic. And spiritual fighting applies in the same manner – learning how to control your ego so it doesn’t control you.

Anyone who doesn't believe this, go watch Fight Club. Then think about how the men all changed when they learnt about fighting. Forget about the big plot. Just see how the men had their lives motivated once they had got in a fight, and they lost their egos, toughening up in the process.

Persuasion and charisma
Persuading someone to do something is rarely just a rational task. A lot of the time in order to persuade or influence someone you have to change their mood or emotions, or cater to one of their needs. This is a skill that needs practice, and practice is trying something to better yourself in the knowledge that you will always be failing to a certain degree.

Think about most best-selling self-help and business books on the market (because they tend to be pretty much the same thing, although in slightly different niches). They all evoke emotions. They use author surrogates, literary devices, and feature a big grinning guru on the front cover. And whether or not they contain much information, the best are those that emotionally move the person most. These books brim with charisma. And people like them. That's why books that are emotionally fulfilling are far better selling than books that just provide pure information - why does Freakonomics or Unlimited Power sell far better than any college level economics text book? Because of the charisma contained within.

Serving
I think knowing how to serve others is another skill, and more than a skill – it’s a discipline. Always presenting value to others in some way shape or form will get other people giving value to you. Why? Because they get addicted to the value you serve them with, and in order to ensure that fix keeps on coming they keep on trying to offer you some value. This concept is explained rather well in Never Eat Alone, where Ferrazzi is told he needs to give value to others for their network to work effectively.

Asset rich, penny poor?
What’s the point of having a big house if you can’t feed yourself or have fun? Or what’s the point of owning a £100,000 car when you instead could travel the world in amazing fashion for two to three years?

Welcome to the world of the asset rich, penny poor. These are the people who put all their money into assets – things that people charge a hell of a lot of money for. Homes, cars, whatever. But the fact of the matter is that thse people could be having a far more enjoyable life if they decided to live life based on experiences, interaction with others and learning.

Next year, I believe I will try to follow a different philosophy - asset poor, money rich. So no car, no house (will try and live somewhere cheaply), no expensive clothes, no expensive possessions - instead, I will work to spend my money on having amazing experiences - experiences that not only are hedonistic (i.e. make me super ultra happy), but also experiences that are self-actualizing, and assist me in constantly growing and changing in a never-ending state of growth.

Suggested articles

Don't worry, be... arrpy (that's asset rich, penny poor)

Aristotle v. Aristippus

http://pos-psych.com/news/rosie-milner/20071025457

An interesting link on happiness - what is better? Hedonism or Self-actualization?

Consciousness, Mind, and Body

Yesterday I finished with the conclusion that in an attempt to figure out what I want, getting an answer wasn't straight forward.

And that is because I really no longer know what I want. Even if I knew I couldn't fail, I still don't know.

This will come of a surprise to many of you. It came as a surprise to me. Having read Tony Robbins books, self-help guides, and written more mission statements and SMART goals than you can wave a stick at, I feel unfulfilled.

The cause of lack of fulfillment
One of the main reasons why I no longer plan away is because it was making me unhappy. Even if I achieved some goals, didn't fulfill others, took all failures as "mis-takes" and lessons, it didn't seem right.

One reason was I had become an athiest. No longer a Catholic, prayer wasn't for me now, and doing what I thought the Big Man would have liked me to do was not the answer.

So what was?

Working towards a theory of person
If there is no God, then figuring out what your passions or values are can be difficult. It's hard. Also, I had recently come across the book The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. This, which I read after a major project had gone severely wrong, and was recommended as a book by a friend, opened my eyes.

I am not my mind. I am not my thoughts. I am only the Now.

I cannot explain this in great detail here - the concept for newcomers requires reflection. But it answered why I had felt bad for so long. I had been controlled by my Ego - and I thought I was my Ego. I thought I was that running narrative inside my head that thinks of only the past or the future, and its goal is to make the future how it wants to have it.

The result is that I had been failing to enjoy life for the last few years. My only respite and enjoyment came from travel - by being 5,000 miles away from work, I stopped thinking and started living, enjoying the moment. But come back to work, and the Ego rose again with its constant planning, and narrative of "this must be done better" or "I wish I could have that... I feel depressed I can't."

Now, being an Athiest, I am not going to simply retreat to this spiritual realm that Tolle describes. Alternatively, I have thought of a theory (which might have come from someone else) to explain who I am. My wish is that by knowing who I am, I will know what I want.

So, what am I made of?
I came up with three components that could be me.

• Consciousness - this is the thoughtless 'being' that Tolle describes in his book. This is a state of being timeless, in the Now, feeling everything as it happens and forgetting the past and the future, for they are only illusions.
• Mind - the Ego. The narrative that runs through the brain, recalling memories, making plans, and using the power of cognition to create a strategy for existence.
• Body - every physical aspect of self, from the body as a whole, to the nutritional and health state of the body, to the neural connections within the brain that cause the sensation of Consciousness and the ability to think.

Now, I am not just one of the parts above - I am all. And they all interact with each other.

For example, by taking LSD, I would be changing my body, which in effect would change the Mind and my Consciousness.

My Mind concentrating on poor achievements and performance would have the effect of causing physiological changes in my body, with stress perhaps reducing the performance of my immune system and raising my heart rate.

And by meditating, accessing Consciousness, my heart rate would slow and the Mind would reduce in intensity and effect on the body.

I believe in deciding what I want to do with my life, or what my specific raison d'etre is, I need to analyse each part of myself as a whole to determine what I should be doing and aiming for.

What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?

This is one concept I have been thinking of in recent days.

What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail?

I have been doing some introspection, and I have thought - the times when I have conned myself most, have been those when I did not want to go for the most.

Many problems can be traced back to this:

• Choosing a degree that was easy to get into - because I could have failed at getting into a more difficult one.
• Not being honest with female friends who I have been attracted to - because I could have rejected.
• Not going to the top boss at the company I work for, and telling him my new idea - because he might not have acted on my suggestion.

Now, of course there are losses that could occur from taking risks - I could have ended up at a far poorer university, I could have alienated my female friends, and I might have had a tough ride at work.

But thinking about this - you only have one shot at life. But within life itself, you can take many routes.

If you were to take the highest risk, highest return route at every turn - would your life turn out better?

This interesting article by Lena Sanchez attempts to answer that question. Failure, is simply a lesson. Anthony Robbins and others prefer to speak of mis-takes, just like a take in a movie was done incorrectly. Learn, think, and take again - maybe going for a different angle or shot this time.

Look retrospectively. If you had actually done something you wanted, but didn't because of failure, what would you have actually lost by now, at this moment in time? Would you be dead? Probably not. Would you be starving? Unlikely, unless you were foolish in your risk taking. Would you have learnt something? Absolutely.

My opinion is that fear of failure comes from in many cases the Ego. You don't want to appear bruised. You'd much rather go for something second-rate, get that, and then overblow its significance to your friends, business contacts, whoever.

But likewise, in myself, the desire for success comes from the Ego. My Ego wants to achieve things. So, what do I really want?

Is my Ego hedging my life?

Now, this is a thought that has just sprung to mind. Hedging is a tool used by the financial industry to reduce risk with investments. Put it simply, if you put money in two pots, there is less chance of both of them going completely empty. If the over all sum gets bigger, you can show this growth off - i.e. boast about your success in life. If it gets smaller, well, you haven't lost everything.

Many tools for business analysis can also be applied as life strategies:

• SWOT analysis - looking internally at your strengths and weaknesses, and looking to the world outside for opportunities and threats.
  
• Determing your personal Mission, Vision and Values.

The thing with hedging your life though is, although it might turn out profitably, did you really get what you wanted? Wouldn't you feel disappointed that you didn't go for something that truly fitted with your nature?

The key question for me, in asking why I have done the things I have done, and why I have avoided the things that I thought I could fail in, requires some form of introspection.

Who am I? What is man composed of?

What do I really want? Or, is the question, what state do I want? What existence do I want?

Do I want to make a story, or live a journey?